♫ it’s going down, i’m yelling Simba ♫
IT’S BEEN 20 YEARS
WHAT DO YOU MEAN ITS BEEN 20 YEARS
oh my god…
everyone has that “thing” about them that people talk about when you’re not there.
WHAT IS MINE
when u think about it you’re either a shift or caps lock person
*has tumblr open in three tabs*
There needs to be a button that unlikes all of the facebook pages I liked two years ago at once
100% very real certified doctor
the balls enter the vagina when??????
what do you mean “when”? the entire point of sex is to get the balls in the vagina by whatever means necessary… american sex ed is truly lacking
it’s very important that i am both cute and powerful
algebra is like a 4n language to me
i hate this site
WHEN PEOPLE CALL ME CUTE I JUST [PUNCHES HOLE THROUGH BRICK WALL WHILE KISSING U ON THE CHEEK]
Why can’t there be a male hooter’s equivalent where male servers are shirtless and highly sexualized for their bodies and looks
Male Strip clubs. You’re thinking of male strip clubs.
No. Not a male strip club. A strip club is a strip club. I want a place called Cahones where waiters wear Speedos and are forced to stuff if they don’t fill out their uniform well enough. I want them to giggle for my tips. I want it to be so normalised and engrained in our culture that women bring their daughters there for lunch (because whaaaaaat the wings are good! Geeze sensitive much?) where they’ll give playful little nudges like, “Wouldn’t mind if you dad had those. Heh heh heh.” that their daughters don’t even understand but will absorb and start to assume is just the normal way grown up women talk about grown up men. I want to playfully ask my waiter if I can have extra nuts on my salad and for him to swat my arm with an Oh, you because he knows if he doesn’t his manager will yell at him. I want other men to pretend to like going there so I think they’re cool. I want to go to Cahones during my lunch break at work and when I come back and tell the other women in the office where I went they chuckle slightly and the men around us suddenly feel self conscious and they don’t know why.
|—||Masu (via cosmofilius)|
The turtle cavalry is serious shit
"Onward, alligator steed!"
"I’m a crocodile."
"Silence, water horse!"
The one in the back looks like it’s wearing a turtle for a hat